if it's broken, fix it

I have recently come to the conclusion that I am lazy. Really. Actually this wasn't a recent discovery, but something I've known for a while. It's a constant battle, one that I lose sometimes because it is so easy to be lazy. I'm sure some of you are like me. I find myself thinking about something I should do or I have an idea about a project, but then I consider how much effort it will take to accomplish the goal.

We live in a society that values convenience and instant gratification above many things. Why save for something when I can get it now on credit? Why should I take that entry-level job when I can stay on unemployment until it runs out? Why work on a relationship that is difficult when I can just leave and find a new one? Or worse, leave and be by myself!

In the past family had value. People worked things out. We felt our legacy was worth fighting for. Now it seems that we value self above all. I think people are confused, thinking that happiness is the most important thing. If it feels good do it! I see this as short sighted. I prefer joy over happiness. What's the difference? Happiness is a feeling, joy is a choice.

So what does this have to do with being lazy? Well relationship takes work. Everyday. And it can be painful. Sometimes we think it's easier to be alone, to not be responsible for anyone but myself. This can be a way to perceived happiness, but in the long run being alone is destructive and it doesn't bring joy. I love my husband, but I don't always like him. I love my children, but I don't always like them. I love my grandkids. . . , you get the point. But, they are worth the effort! And they make me a better person because of the relationships we work on together.

There is a song out right now by Francesca Battistelli called, If We're Honest. Here are some of the lyrics that I think speak to the issue of the difficulty of relationship and the benefit of working it out.

Truth is harder than a lie 

The dark seems safer than the light 
And everyone has a heart that loves to hide 
I'm a mess and so are you 
We've built walls nobody can get through
Yeah, it may be hard, but the best thing we could ever do, ever do 

Bring your brokenness, and I'll bring mine
'Cause love will heal what hurt divides
And mercy's waiting on the other side
If we're honest 

I have joy, unspeakable joy when I look at the faces of my sweet grandchildren. Why, because I know the work that it took to get to this point, and I am thankful that Papawizzy and I chose to work it out. There were tough times for sure. There were times when we didn't know if we would make it! But we chose joy over happiness. Legacy over history. We made the decision to work it out; fix it instead of throw it away. 

It makes me sad when I see couples give up. If they can hold on and not give in to a feeling but instead consider it all joy as they work together to fix it. We must live with the choices we make and if we choose to fix it rather than throw it away we will be stronger and healthier for our effort.

So will you fix it or throw it away?

Blessings,
Mamawizzy